MOVIE: Something’s cooking in The Kitchen

Paul O’Rourke

HELL’S Kitchen was a district of Manhattan that Irish gangs like the Westies famously ruled over in the 1960s and ‘70s.

That group’s reputation was such that city Mayor Rudy Giuliani once referred to them as the most savage mob in New York history, news that probably caused the Italian mafia leader to choke on his meatballs.

And that story now forms the basis of ‘The Kitchen’, from first time director, Andrea Berloff. But here’s the twist, the three main characters are not male, but female, proving that women have the right to be savage mob leaders too. Interesting premise.

First rule of kitchen club, apart from not talking about it, is to make sure you have all the correct ingredients at hand.

Step one, you’ll need a top drawer cast. Elizabeth Moss, Melissa McCarthy and Tiffany Haydash. Check. Step two, you’ll need an interesting story. Check. Step three, you’ll need a kick ass script.

Hello? Anyone? At the very least you’ll need a just about acceptable script that at least tells a coherent story. No? Ok, now we’re in trouble. Add to the mix, direction from Berloff that is as ham fisted as her writing, and that beautiful cake we thought we were making is now turning into some sort of burnt tasteless cupcake from hell.

It seems the producers have decided there’s a new way to bake and you don’t need any flour. Take one female director, three female leads and forget about the story. Even if it tastes bad, nobody will be brave enough to criticise.

Rather than award this effort any stars, we’ll leave the last word to Vulture critic Angelica Bastien who wrote: “I half-expected every scene to end with a freeze-frame high five or the women yelling girl power.”

Also in cinemas this week are ‘The Goldfinch’, adapted from the book of the same name which tells the story of teen Theo Decker (Ansel Elgort) who has to deal with the tragic death of his mother, and ‘Don’t Let Go’ which stars David Oyelowo as a detective who gets a phone call from his recently murdered niece.